Life isn't smooth sailing, as always.

I had a bad day, today.

My patient died under my hand. She came with septicaemia. Down with DIVC. Needed a central line. However got oedematous peripheral limbs because of overload. Lower limbs were inflamed. Trial of Short line through internal jugular would only stress her limits as her INR was 5. My boss said:" Proceed, I trust you."

So Short line tried, but got stucked at 5 cm. Then I got it removed at once. Bleeding was mad. Haemostasis secured only after 15 minutes of compression. 15 mins later, she went into asystole. Resuscitated for 1 hour. Unable to bring her back. Thinking back, was it my mistake? Probably. But her premorbid status was not well, either. She would need the High dependency ward back-up the very least, or intensive care unit. But none were available.

Sigh!

Working in such a tight resource, is really stretching the limits. You have datelines, you have urgent things, you have sidelines, all coming to your face at the same time.

Time to ease out a little bit. Life goes on.

Insider Vs Outsider

"Chinese are the immigrant, squatters"

I can't believe I am still hearing such a low mentality statements being made.

Despite being independent for more than half a decade, the fundamental mentality is still stopping at British colonial times. As a Malaysian Chinese, we had rooted here for such a long time that we have little or no memory that we originates from China. I am born as a 'Malaysian'.I do not have a place in China for me. My mainland is here, Malaysia.

Despite all the moves to recognize every entity as 'Malaysian', there are people who still can't get over the overwhelming feeling of their own race being the greater one. Understandable. When we are equal, lost are the special privileges, unfairness, and foul play. Having a divided race entity is important in this context.

We may be independent at the outside, but inside, there is still a long way to go.

The Doctor With Fxxxed Up Teeth

How do you feel, if a doctor walks up to you, when you are sick, lying down on the bed. She oped her mouth: "What brings you here to the hospital?" You almost fainted with the stench of an unmanaged teeth.

This reminds me of a colleague of mine. Whenever he is post-call, he never care to brush teeth. He will carry on with the next day job. While this may be good as responsibility towards his job is high, it doesn't help in term of his personal image as a doctor. When he speaks, I stood 3 feet away.

Halitosis, or commonly known as bad breath, is a under-addressed issue. It doesn't affect only doctors, but people from all walks of life that doesn't find it necessary to brush their teeth. It is as bad as having a body odour.

Being in this field, talking sometimes play a therapeutic role. Having a bad breath does not help the situation at all. Not to mention the yellowish stained teeth and what it can do to the doctor's image. So a reminder to myself and my friends: Take good care of your oral hygiene.