Growing Up!

Finally, I can say I had reached a stage of equilibrium. Stage of maturity. Full grown.

Now, as I wrote this blog, I am being promoted as officer in a small town's hospital. As a matter of fact, I am being in charge of the casualty. With it, its safe to say that my job has come to a stable pace. I enjoyed more privilege than before. There are staffs that I have to take care and work together. People will look up to you for decision making. Your decision finally will affect the patient's life. I am not afraid. I believe I have enough of 'juice' to run the casualty. It's the skills that I need to honed up.

Before this, if I have any doubt, there is always someone senior to guide me through. But now, I am fully in charge of my own decision and the decision of others under my care. This is the process of growing up, and growing out of my shell.

I am enjoying my life, now, at least. Every moment of it.

Love is...

Love is putting someone above yourself, sacrificing yourself for the one you love.

Love is stopping by for grandma cross the busy road

Love is cooking a hearty meal and put food on table

Love is thinking of people in need, and cry for not able to help them

Love is caring and guiding your enemy, despite how they mistreat you

Love is waking up in the middle of the night and making coffee for two

Love is caring yourself well, don't let your loved one worry

Love is holding the hand of Ill one, and say the couraging words

Love is never overlooked small happiness in life

Love is nothingness






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My Babies

Work is so boring, if not because of all these kiddo, I wouldn’t enjoy much of my work of late…

First is the monitor of the ward. Hehe. Sleeping soundly. But when he is awake, he can make the havoc out of the ward, Poor thing, still oxygen dependent.

This little gem always gives you a wide smile. All he wants is you to carry him around. He is the most cheerful from the lot. And witty too.

Whoa! She gave me shock the first time I saw her, and still do. If you happen to walk into the ward in midnight and she is wide awake, might give you a scare or two.

Mr Sweet is always so adorable… The crewcut is due to branula setting. Otherwise, he is a vey quiet boy, feed the fastest and sleep most of the time. The eyes are big, but I am doubtful that he can sees.

Time Waits For No One

Year 2009 just zoomed by. I was taken by surprise. Without a sign, Spring turns summer, then autumn and now its winter. December in just a flicker of candlelight. Looking back to my resolution made in 2008, I was shocked that I achieve few, if not none.

For one, I did reunite with old friends. We had good time going up Mount Kinabalu. We had nice foods. We chat till dawn. The old company is still close together. I really appreciate these old dogs. They coloured my life.

Regrettable, my weighty issue still not settled. Maybe I did nothing about it. Guess this is gonna be my 2010 resolution.

While I didn’t joined or affiliate with any organization, this is due to the fact that I was not ready, I can’t meet up with people’s expectation while not having adequate skills and knowledge. I always love to help people.

Another wish that was fulfilled, that is I got my first dSLR. Its a Nikon D40. It might not be the very best one, but it served the purpose well. I am still learning on how to use it, though. Right now, it churns out pretty good pictures. I just love it.

My hope for year 2010:

1. Enjoy my work and doing what I know best. I am going to finish housemanship soon. Hopefully I can get to do what I want then.
2. Health, not only me, but my father, mother, and everyone.
3. Love. I wish that I can bring the relationship to another level
4. Travel. The next destination is China/Taiwan. And if possible the States.
5. Weight loss

Tragedy

“You made me.

Yet you left me.

This is where I am. In this cold room. All the time. Why? Because you made me.”

This is what a child felt. Two years old. And five months in the ward. Not a single soul came to claim him. Nobody visited him. No family members fed him. Day in and day out, he was kept in the ward. Waiting for placement in special welfare home.

According to the officer, paperwork takes 3 months to half a year. Placement is subject to availability. So we wait…

It started when the child was brought to us by a referral from district hospital. A child from aborigines in Pahang came down with odd symptoms. He kept on have repeating bouts of cough post feeding, fever and was unwell. On top of that, the child lacks facial expression. At two years old, he is still unable to vocalize, nor responds to his parents. There is a problem with his swallowing mechanism. The secretions pools everytime. He can’t swallow. He can’t cough. The is paralysis to his facial muscles due to defect in the cranial nerves. He gets bouts of aspiration leading to pneumonia. Feeding tube were made.

The parents is of the lower socio-economy group. Apart from this child, they need to take care of more kids. They need to work. They need to feed a family of 10. Staying in hospital is out of question. Taking care of a special need child is totally impossible. Bringing the child for follow up is a no-no. There is only one road. Disowning him.

Fate is a strange thing. Some are lucky, some don’t. I guess this is survival of the fittest.

In One Breath

Hundreds of steps under my feet, but I have to just go on. I can’t stop and will not stop, until I reached my destination. There may be missing steps, and potholes along the way. Sometimes, the railings were missing, but it can’t stop me. I am determined this time, and I will reach to the top!

There Is Always Hope

When you come to a crossroad, no signs leading to your destination, and you are lost. The road you took seems new and unfamiliar. Don’t despair. There is always hope. Just hold on. Eventually you will reach your destination.

At the dead of the night, you can’t see where you go, and you lost your way. You can’t figure out the path. Don’t be afraid. The daylight is just around the corner. At the break of the dawn, everything will be crystal clear.

This journey is full of challenges, and the reward is waiting for those who is persistent and determined. Just hope, and always hope for the best.

Wish you success, my dearest.